No need to say goodbye

Just because everything's changing
Doesn't mean it's never
Been this way before

**

Now we're back to the beginning
It's just a feeling and no one knows yet
But just because they can't feel it too
Doesn't mean that you have to forget

Let your memories grow stronger and stronger
Til they're before your eyes

**

I'll come back
When you call me
No need to say goodbye

**

PS: To all my Aussie buddies & family.
PSS: To Jian.

Pek Ghe's

is the place I spent my second last night in Melbourne at.

Slept at 11 pm [O M G] , woke up at 6.15am [ O M G ^2]

At 6.30am, the fire alarm went off

and the residents of College Square took the stairs to save their lives!!!!!!

Okay fine everyone had a wth look 'cause clearly all were still in pajamas

and strolled down the stairs ten mins after the alarm went off LOL

but clearly I was thrilled!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Exclaiming all the way down.

How exciting! On my last day in Melbourne.

With two big fireman truck and a dozen of FIREMEN

reminds me of 烈火雄心.

Clearly Cousin gave me a "omg wth" look HAHA

but I understand her pain of having at least 10 false alarms a year

most during unearthly hours.

Yes it was a false one too this time.

Even the firemen had a wth look.

hahahah how entertaining.

**

Then Couz and I walked to RMH

and I bid her farewell on Level 5

General Admission Ward

Goodbye my dear - you'll settle down soon ok?

Esp with your hectic hours!

Will miss you dearly pls let's keep in touch with OUR IPHONE4 hahhahaha

**

And then I sat at on a bench in the hospital for a good half an hour

observing the hustle and bustle.

Thinking of the decision I made

and the difference it made

No doubt I still feel the wave of what-ifs.

Still the allure.

**

Anyway I'm at the Bailieu Library now

still my favourite place - but just this time

it's empty.

Okay shall head off to settle admin stuff.

My camera is loaded with pics of the view as I am walking

from the house, bus stop, bus, train platform, train view

and some other random shots.

I hope I can leave without too much attachment

but who am I kiddin'?


**

Met up with Anne and Elwin yesterday

one 70 and one 78

their stories, humour and care

I feel sad to say goodbye.

I wish them good health, happiness and prosperity.

And hope I'll see them again.

**

Sadness aside

much more awaits today

packing, agent photography, pest control

but it's ok

for Jian shall accompany me.

**
Such incoherent train of thoughts.

Okay. Shall sign off now.



PS: Think of the memories not what might have been.

I am inspired

though with ugly tan lines and shattered body

HAHAHHAHA.

Australian Open 2011 was AWESOME.

AWESOME. AWESOME. AWESOME.

Watched my first tennis match live hehehe.

Verdasco!! Even if he lost.

And it wasn't just about tennis,

Australian Open was a CARNIVAL.

Freebies. Crowd. Music. BEER. Foot Spa. Massages. Photobooth.

I love carnivals.

**

Thanks to Olgs and Julz for the full-on laughter day.

Love my SIP-ers :D

Quote of the day:

Julz ordering ice-cream: "Can I have Heaven?"

XD

**

Pics are on facebook!


PS: Thank you gals, I am truly happy.

A million pieces

Shouts my body.

Blinds, windows, oven (work-in-progress, stubborn oil stains), laundry.

Am so so so tired.

Ah - feels like there's some more to do.

Call 3, collect medicine [Mon] , settle pay,
Pest control [ Mon noon]
meet Anne [Mon Morning] , Jian [Tues], Peggy [Mon night]
Collect calc from MC [Mon]
Settle textbooks [Tues]

AND get done with residual packing [zzz]

then home on Wed :)


**
Anyway

guess who's going for Australian Open tomorrow?

tee-hee.

Not going to see any player in particular,

'cause who am I kidding

I know nuts about tennis

save for the Hewitt-Nalbandian match I watched on TV on Day 2

and some basics explanation from bro

and some last minute wiki-ing NOW

hahaha.

All for the experience

yay one more ticked off the to-see.


**

PS: Goodbye seems to be the hardest words.

Tagged by Jian - Feud btw Caspian and Peter

Three names I go by:

1. Mei Shan

2. Mei, Ah Mei, Meis, Mshanlow, May, Me, MS, LMS

3. 善姑, Piggy, Robin Girl

Three Jobs I have had in my life:

1. Teacher

2. Academic Support Worker

3. Student XD

Three Places I have lived:

1. Petaling Jaya

2. Shah Alam

3. Melbourne

Three Favorite drinks:

1. Bali Limau Ais

2. Pearl Milk Tea

3. Chrysanthemum Tea

Three TV Shows that I watch:

1. Farmer wants a wife

2. NCIS

3. KangXi

Three places I have been: *most recent*

1. Cousin Peggy's

2. House - room, toilet, kitchen ekeke. sleep, s***, eat

3. CITY

Three places I am looking forward to go:

1. Home

2. Spiritual Soul-Searching Places [Cambodia, Vietnam, Peru, NZ]

3. Places in Australia that I ought to have visited but didn't : Uluru, Great Barrier Reef, Tasmania

People that I sms/sms me regularly:

1. Jian Ong Jian Yin

2. Mengs

3. METRO - "Your line has been suspended due to fallen tree", "Your next train is delayed". zzz.

Three of my favorite foods:

1. POTATO (roast/mash/chips)

2. Tosei Cheese (Cheese)

3. M&M and Smarties (choc)

[these are food RIGHT?]

Three friends I think will respond:

1. Meng Jin - because aiya u will la.

2. Rachael, because we're Famous 5 HAHAHA.

3. Sara, because she's into working out - and this shall be good finger exercise haha

Three things I am looking forward to:

1. Cleaning my toilet after this tag [positive thinking]

2. CHINESE NEW YEAR 2011

3. STARTING TO EARN MONEHHHHH *ka-ching ka-ching*

Three things that are always by your side:

1. Handphone

2. Laptop

3. Snacks - I- mean- Books

Three things I always look forward to during weekends:

1. Me-time [sleep/eat/youtube/read]

2. Meeting up with people

3. Planning the week ahead

Three things I always do every morning:

1. Facebook

2. Watch TV

3. Toilet TAKE-MY-TIME time



Awkward ending indeed. hahaha

Packing up - Uni

Of all subjects, it's the breadth subjects materials that I can't seem to part with.

The Core (Accounting esp) just went to the bin straight away.

Almost all gone. Nada. zilch.

I guess that meant that I enjoyed my breadths whole-heartedly.

Creative, Play and Art - where I went on kindergarden site observations as well as designed a summer vacation kids program!

Intercultural Communication - where I eave-dropped on train to investigate how people greet each other differently as well as conducted a research on Apologies cross-culture!

And the most memorable subject for me was Generating the Wealth of Nation, taught by none other but Prof. Jeff Borland. The readings were marvelous materials (mostly history) and they are my train-read No. 1. But the pinnacle has got to be my research on the Spaniards conquer of Mexico using guns and germs.
I felt most heartbroken seeing the materials packed into the recycle box.

Nonetheless,
All hail the New Generation model that allowed for breadth subjects (albeit the controversies that saw the ranks slipping)- for exposing us to not only Commerce knowledge but almost everything under the sun!

I'm lying if I said I didn't enjoy the course. The knowledge, the insights & perspective, the skills.

BComm 2008-2010 rox my socks (is that how it's said )! I'm an ALUMNI now! hahahaha.



PS: This time around, it's not UniMelb brochure materials ;p

Happy Birthday!

Happy 22nd Birthday Mengs!

Glad the surprise worked out!

9 years of friendship and counting yay, very grateful of that!!!!

Shan't say more but best wishes to you!


On your birthday,

please watch this Kang Xi episode!




There are 5 parts to it, you can find them easily!


I felt really happy watching it,
because it reminded me of how
life can be really happy
so long
one is simple, contented,
optimistic
and at peace with him/herself and others!


Wishing you a joyous year ahead!

It's summer and it's been raining

..the day before yesterday, yesterday, today..

..and will be for the rest of next week..

**

While personally I love it when it rains
for the peace and security I feel now
ironically
it is peace and security that are taken away
with the Disaster the rains are creating elsewhere
depriving people of their homes, jobs and sanity
and for some, Life.

Reading the reports of death tolls, sacrifices and anxiety
and listening to personal accounts
send a chill down my spine.

Looking at the heavy downpour by my window
the garden never so green and alive.
Whoever have thought that it would be
this catastrophic just a state away?

**

Flashes of The Day After Tomorrow
are in my mind

A friend suggested Noah's Ark.


**

The rain won't last forever
The floods will subside

My thoughts are with you
for the aftermath will be
the beginning of an end.

**

In comparison
I shall hold no grudge.

Hello again!

First and foremost, I know it's the 12th now but Happy New Year!

I suddenly had the urge to write. At this very moment, I'm flooded with mixed emotions.


1. Guilt

This is probably the strongest feeling I'm experiencing now. Counting down the days I have left in Melbourne, I know I haven't been moving my lazy bum enough. There are things lying there awaiting me to do, and I'm sorry to say everything is moving.. really slowly. If not for the meet ups with Olga and Juls yesterday and Cousin Peggy during the weekend, I wouldn't have realized how much time has passed in the world outside and how unproductive I have been.

Sigh. I'm a hermit. And the biggest guilt I have is :

That I'm not feeling guilty enough.

**

2. Sad

Or rather, attached. Since I'm leaving Melbourne, and most importantly my house in Eltham. It may not be the nearest place to civilization, but I guess that's its appeal.

When I first came, Eltham is the place I feel most depressed. What with the culture shock and being far from everything else. Yet 3 years have passed, and Eltham is my home. I may not know a whole lot of people, but I seek solace here. I feel secure from the crazy winds or hot airs. outside. I enjoy sipping tea while watching shows from the 1960s. Experimenting easy survival food and enjoying the results in front of YouTube. And sitting by the window when it rains. When I am away from home too long, I feel uncomfortable. I'd travel the distance to come home. I may be with myself a lot, but I'm never alone at home.

All the friendships with the elderly and bus drivers, the lovely town and library, the heritage of this century-old village, all the greenery and all the peace; I'm reluctant to leave. I am tempted to leave them without saying goodbye for it's going to be heavy on my heart- but I shouldn't. Given the care they showered me. To make me feel part of the community. I shouldn't.

And what more, my friends back in Melbourne. Life's going to take a change with us in different continents. But I am relieved by the fact that we'd be bounded by technology and the will to keep in touch. That's much better in comparison to - not being able to see Eltham till I duno when.

Sigh.


**

3. Excited

Because I'm finally returning to Malaysia! To be with my family and fellow buddies To be in my comfort zone. To not have to miss all the festive seasons. To be home.

Though, it's gonna take some time getting used to that old life. New old life.

Talk about multiple culture shocks. Still not good at it.

**

4. Uncertain

Because I just looked up the CFA website and spent the afternoon researching. Undeniably, it is prestigious. But it comes with a tough 4 years ahead (or more? ). 10-15 hours of self-study per week, on top of working hours? 66% fail rate? Close to rare chances of completing it in one attempt? What will become of my life? Will I be able to keep a balance?

All these wouldn't matter if it brings me ultimately to my long term goal.

Most importantly, is my long term goal aligned with this accreditation I'm about to take up? Will I venture into portfolio/asset/investment management in the future?

**
5. Ambitious

Besides career-wise, I still dream to continue my volunteering activities that I chose to give up due to a job. Not that I'm regretting it, for I know with better stability comes better command of the priorities I desire. Have been looking up the disability support services back home, hoping to continue my uni work.

Yet issue #4 means that. This ambition is gonna be tough, to be of high priority. Which leads to #6.

**

6. Annoyed

By the fact that I am not living in a world alone. I co-exist with people and I need to make decisions that are not selfish nor self-centered. Maybe this period of doing-nothing-important has made me live a life like never before - with everything centered around me. I wake up, sleep, eat, go out etc whenever I wish. I'm beginning to feel complacent with this life. It's not exactly the most orderly lifestyle but people bringing in orders now make life frustrating for me. Yet, more clearly than anyone else, I know the orders are necessary, for what I'm living now is not reality. It is temporary.

Hence, am annoyed by the fact that I am annoyed. Which leads to #1.

**
7. Avoidance

It's the ultimate resolution to cope with everything. Like going to bed now.

Sigh.

**

Tomorrow when I wake up I want to feel good.

I need to do something.


PS: inner struggles.